Thursday 1 November 2012


                                                               TIME TALK
 Time line, time pass, time dilation, New York Times, Times of India, time bomb, time this, time that, time, time, time.

Well, the list can go on. But now, I know what is bothering your neurons!

No. Not the ultimate question of life, for which the answer is 42. But why on earth (or Vogosphere!) am I talking about time, when we have no time to make some time to read this shit (sheet?)?

Allow me to explain the “Time syndrome” which bothers me every time I think about time. 

Disclaimer: Geek alert, geek alert. I speak Geek in the following lines. My words may smell chemistry. Sometimes they may come alive and try to poke your eyes. So wear goggles and take off your thinking cap for your safety. Fasten your pant belt (or should that be seat belt?) and don’t break the speed limit, for thou shall be killed.

Is das clarr? (Don’t reach for dictionary to look up das clarr , coz it does not exist)

Now that I have warned you, let me set up the scene for you.

Tick tock, tick tock…….
1:10 AM.
It was quiet and calm outside my room while there was an equal amount of chaos in my brain.
Tiny alarm clocks (or were they biological clocks?) were swinging from one neuron to the other. I know, they were doing it in vengeance. Every time my alarm rang, I used to thump him on his head and cajole my sleep.



Yes, they were taking revenge on me. They swung, they wrenched, they pulled all my neurons .while one of them slid down my spine (from r3 to r8, to speak in Geek), the other ran a program (in T++, an object and time oriented programming language) in my brain.

Consequence: Ugh……. Honey, I was shrunk.
I found myself in a clock.
It was (and still is) a small world there, in the clock; a family of 10 members (0 to 9).Each member has a surname, AM or PM, depending on time.1 is seen either alone or with his twin brother at 11 or his friend, 0 at 10 or his another friend (who is a girl) at 12.

Pss….Psssss. come closer…………… clooooser.
I know a secret. Don’t tell this to any one, especially 1.
There is a rumor that 1 has an affinity to 2. He is so in love with her (reference: some paper in Times journal)*. But 2 seems to have given her valence electron (or is it her heart?) to 3. They form a strong bond (Stronger than that with 1, possibly a covalent bond) that they are mostly near to each other, except at 12.
You don’t believe me?
Then may be your thinking cap is still on. Safety I say, safety. How many times should I repeat it for you? I am telling you, I am not responsible if you go crazy after reading this piece.

Anyways, coming back to the family. Their life starts at 6 am. No, not sleeping lazily, but doing their duty punctually. They ring the alarm, just to get hit on the clock’s head. You might be thinking how boring their life is, to do the same thing again and again. They say “We try to see new things in the old-every day. We never get bored. And we do have our own sweet time to read, write, contemplate, have fun etc. When we are at hard times, we just change our batteries (but don’t kill ourselves).  You are a moron, if you lose time.”

So you suffer from Time syndrome, if you are a procrastinator or a secret agent [Bond, James (chemical) bond] recruited to kill time.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Post script: I was just kidding. I don’t have Time syndrome.

Post postscript: Well, may be a little.

Post -post- postscript: My skills of procrastination and the subsequent realization of the loss due to wasting time was the driving force to write this piece. Yes, the force does follow New-Ton’s laws of motion. No, don’t ask me any more questions. I am immune to them.

* Reference is given just to make you believe that the hypothesis is scientifically proved (P>0.05, n= 1 and 2). Hence, proved. Ting ting ti din…..:)

Image credit: CLUE (Comics about Life, Universe and everything)